My Cast of Characters is headlined by Lucy. Fr. Kirk knows Lucy—he actually named her!—but he doesn’t realize that Lucy is short for Lucinda, and Lucinda has been around for decades. In this blog, I’m going to introduce her, because she’s been pounding on the door demanding both an introduction and the floor, and what Lucy wants, Lucy usually gets!
Lucy is my protector. She arrived to help out shy, over-sensitive Kathy at a very young age—around 7 I think—and as I’ve grown up and grown older, she’s aged and evolved as well. Lucy might well be a gift from the Divine, but she’s certainly chosen some very unholy tactics to do her job over the years. But before I tell you more about her, let me say that I ADORE Lucy, and I’m really happy she’s getting a chance to be seen and eventually heard.
Lucy has quite a temper. She’s got brass balls, a stiff upper lip, and a cold, hard gaze that can wilt the bravest. Lucy shows up whenever someone in my life starts being a jerk, or what she perceives as being a jerk. That means giving me orders, putting me down, demanding too much and providing too little, or in some way stifling my voice. She also has zero tolerance for cruelty and injustice, towards me or anybody else.
When I was a child, Lucy didn’t speak up. She seethed with repressed anger, and muttered imprecations in the mirror to my persecutors—usually my big sister, who was stronger than me and not afraid to prove it. Lucy has developed a strong voice over time, and she isn’t afraid to use it anymore. But Lucy has a “my way or the highway” attitude that hasn’t always served us well. She doesn’t like to talk about feelings, and she sees distance and detachment as the best insurance against pain and disappointment. Lucy takes pride in her independence and her ability to go it alone. Neediness disgusts her, especially in me. Lucy likes to take risks: she’s an adrenaline junkie. Oh—and she LOVES bad boys---like Fr. Kirk, for example. We wouldn’t be together if it weren’t for Lucy. But that’s a story for another day. It’s time for me to step aside and let Lucy start talking.